12. Living Loss, or A Solitude of Memory

Like waters that waver, that border belief
Over pools as profound as bright moonlight through mist
She stared at him smiling. He turned, she turned
In speechless regard:
- two quiet Quendi, -
- a silent bard. -

'Daeron -' she dared, then suddenly stopped.
'Daeron - why death I would call less cruel
'Than life that loves by living loss!'
'Better the bitter, caustic kindness,
'Crying
- 'that sears and seals and soothes the heart,' -
- 'than anguish never-dying.' -

'But still - yet still - I cannot comprehend
'When matters had moved to their ultimate end
'Why you left the land whose hollows and hills
'Had echoed your art
- 'to live in the East -
- 'by dark waters apart.' -

'Was your grief so great that the land you loved
'In memory mirrored pent-up pain?'
'Did your bitterness burning fear to face
'Beren beside Tinuviel returning?'
'I cannot conceive it:'
- 'Daeron, please, Daeron,' -
- 'Must I believe it?' -

As the scintillating sun may loom through a lens
Too bright to bear: so he frowned in his confusion
As if at an illusion's flaming focus
Unaware.
- As if the sun were silenced -
- by the starkness of his stare. -

'No man - none! - can boast of besting me
'In courage, strength of spirit, courtesy!'
'And if alive one born of Barahir
'Returned from dread
- 'with Lúthien I'd welcome him -
- 'no matter whom he wed.' -

'But no man - none! - can dare that dark
'And ghastly gloom, brave Angband's
'Deadly doors where shadows loom
'And hope for life;'
- 'much less to win -
- 'that perfect gem, a wife.' -

'But I - yet I - released brave Lúthien
'To dare those doors, a maiden-moth
'Constrained to seek a fouler flame
'To help her hero's helpless hand!'
'And thus I am forsworn:
- remiss in duty, for my lord's -
- bereaved, betrayed,forlorn. -

'And so I stray in the East alone.'
'Landless, lordless, loveless I live
'To walk dark waters, to sing under star
'Of Lúthien's life and beauty:'
- 'Until we meet in Mandos' halls -
- 'A solitude of memory.' -